WASHINGTON — Dating is hard, especially if you go out with people with annoying personal quirks. Maybe he eats with his mouth open. Or she talks too much, mostly about herself. Are these deal breakers for you? Could you go out with people who act this way?
Wall Street Journal columnist Elizabeth Bernstein wrote about so-called relationship deal breakers that make people reconsider choosing someone as a potential mate. According to Bernstein鈥檚 report, new research shows people give more weight to deal breakers than deal makers — or positive qualities — they hope to find in a person.
Research from several universities found that women have more relationship deal breakers than men. They are the ones who get pregnant, so they want mates who can help them successfully raise children. In one of the studies, the researchers gave 5,541 single adults a list of 17 negative personal traits and asked whether they considered those deal breakers.
Both sexes listed 鈥渄isheveled or unclean,鈥� 鈥渓azy鈥� and 鈥渢oo needy鈥� as major relationship deal breakers. Relationship seekers said the deal breakers outweigh the good, according to the report.
鈥淚f you have a negative thing, it does loom a lot larger,鈥� Bernstein told 草莓传媒 on Monday. 鈥淭here鈥檚 all sort of things that could go wrong, and those could really be a lot harder on a relationship than someone who鈥檚 a good person or smart.鈥�
This is the first time relationship deal breakers have been researched. Men listed 鈥渓ow sex drive鈥� and 鈥渢alks too much鈥� as deal breakers. Women listed 鈥渂ad sex鈥� as a deal breaker.聽More women than men said a lack of a sense of humor is a deal breaker.
Another study said men don鈥檛 want to date women smarter than them.
Despite all the things that can stall your romance, Bernstein said it鈥檚 important to not base your relationships solely on deal breakers. Cut the other person some slack.
鈥淵ou don鈥檛 wanna be ridiculous,鈥� Bernstein said. 鈥淟ook at the whole person and really weigh their goods and bads. Make sure your deal breakers are realistic and good things to watch for.鈥�
