WASHINGTON 鈥� Thanksgiving is a time for turkey, pies and football. It鈥檚 also a time when many families spend a lot of time together, which can cause some friction.
Anticipating your interactions with difficult family members can help diffuse the tension during the holidays, says Dr. Robi Ludwig, a psychotherapist and a relationship contributor for Investigation Discovery Network鈥檚 鈥淪corned.鈥�
鈥淵ou have to know you鈥檙e going into a situation that isn鈥檛 perfect,鈥� Ludwig said on 草莓传媒 Tuesday. 鈥淭hink about, in advance, the people you may have trouble with and try to prepare in your mind how you鈥檙e best going to deal with them.鈥�
Remaining in control of your emotions and not being reacting rashly to family members鈥� comments can prevent any outbursts, Ludwig says.
鈥淓ven if you鈥檙e right under those circumstances, you鈥檙e still wrong. So really try to go in there with a commitment to yourself and a way of seeing yourself that helps you rise to your best self.鈥�
Dealing with family during the holidays can be even pricklier when factoring in the vitriol of 2016 presidential campaigns and political squabbles.
Politics can be dangerous territory because 鈥測ou鈥檙e never going to convince somebody who has an opposite perspective,鈥� Ludwig says.
In a region where political banter is second nature, Ludwig says it is important to know with whom you鈥檙e talking politics and don鈥檛 let it drift into personal attacks.
鈥淚f you can talk about politics and disagree without going to that personal attacking level, fine, have an intellectually stimulating discussion,鈥� she says. 鈥淏ut many people can鈥檛 go there, so I think proceed with caution.鈥�
Ludwig offered some tips to remember to make holidays peaceful with thorny family members:
- Create boundaries and space from the troublesome family member
- Only invite family members you enjoy being around
- Write down how you want to behave
- Don鈥檛 get sucked into family arguments that don鈥檛 end well
鈥淯nderstand messy relationships is [sic] just part of being human,鈥� Ludwig says. 鈥淲hat you really need to do is set your intentions.鈥�
